Directed by Josh Greenbaum
Written by Annie Mumolo and Kristen Wiig
Starring Annie Mumolo, Kristen Wiig, Jamie Dornan, and Damon Wayans, Jr.
Running time 107 minutes
MPA rating PG-13 for beachy shenanigans and female tomfoolery
Available for digital rental Feb. 12

by Jaime Davis, Staff Writer, The Fixer

I first saw the teaser trailer for Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar in early 2020, which is the last time I set foot in a movie theater (I just got sad typing that out). The teaser was super short, with barely any real information provided, but I was immediately captivated by the reteaming of Annie Mumolo and Kristen Wiig, whose super fun Bridesmaids is a classic and very much a watch staple in my repertoire. The teaser features Mumolo and Wiig as what I call Midwestern Marys: middle-aged fuddy-duddies with indistinct Midwestern accents–they could be from Kalamazoo, Oshkosh, Winnetka, who knows! A Midwestern Mary obsesses over the latest casserole recipe they unearthed on Pinterest and can’t wait to make it for their loved ones, enjoys anything beige or plain, likes to make homespun crafts, are a bit more conservative in their views, tends to match their earrings to their necklace, and considers Talbot’s and Chico’s the height of fashion. 

In fact, Barb and Star features at least one joke about both stores and more attention is paid to culottes than really should be in 2021 (fun fact: my grandmother, who’s only about 34% Midwestern Mary, calls these “pedal pushers.”) In case you’re unfamiliar with culottes, the film opens with an informative title card containing an official definition of the roomy cropped pants, so don’t worry about learning the vernacular! The movie has you covered. 

I want to clarify really quick that obviously there’s nothing wrong with being a Midwestern Mary. I’m originally from the Midwest–the Western suburbs of Chicago to be exact. Approximately 43% of my family members (and their friends) are Midwestern Marys. They play bunco. They love their wine time. They make interesting desserts out of grapes and cream cheese. Also, my mom worked at Chico’s for many years and my other mom worked at Talbot’s for a long time. So like, I respect my moms and their service to both of these fine retail institutions. And I love a good casserole, especially if there’s cheese and potatoes involved. 

Anyway, culottes. There’s a lot of them in Barb and Star. I’m no data scientist, but how much you get a kick out of culottes mayyyy determine how much you enjoy this movie.

The overall plot of Barb and Star was quite unexpected to me–mostly because I hadn’t done any research and had long ago made up my mind that I wanted to watch this movie no matter what. It starts innocently enough with a young paperboy riding through his neighborhood delivering papers and innocently lip-syncing along to Barbara Streisand and Andy Gibb’s “Guilty”, as most young people do. But then it’s revealed that the paperboy is Yoyo, in fact not an innocent tween but an evil henchkid assisting the equally evil Sharon Gordon Fisherman–also played by Kristen Wiig, doing a pretty fine Tilda Swinton impression, which I mostly enjoyed. They’re aided by Edgar (Jamie Dornan, taking a sharp right after all those Fifty Shades movies), an insecure orphan who’s been infatuated with Sharon Gordon Fisherman and manipulated by her for years–you see, once her evil plan is carried out, she’ll finally, finallyyyy be his real girlfriend. Uh huh. Sharon Gordon Fisherman has, of course, some bizarre backstory validating her vicious quest to destroy the colorful and happy resort town of Vista Del Mar, Florida. 

Meanwhile, at Jennifer Convertibles…we’re introduced to our adorable Barb and Star. They’ve just been let go from their jobs, because no one at Jennifer Convertibles corporate bothered to inform their store that they went out of business months ago. The two BFF’s and roomies have their own tearjerker pasts–Barb’s already a widow and Star’s ex-husband cheated on her, leading her to believe she’s completely disgusting. So after a recommendation from a friend (a blink-and-you’ve-missed-her Wendi McClendon-Covey), our gal pals are off to Vista Del Mar for a change of scenery. Little do they know they’re about to cross paths (and more) with Sad Edgar. Will they save Vista Del Mar from the evilll clutches of evilll Sharon Gordon Fisherman? 

This movie has everything: Richard Cheese, two (t-w-o) song and dance numbers, a recipe for hot dog soup, explosions, a talking crab who may or may not be voiced by Morgan Freeman, a gag about women named Trish, a drug-induced threesome, weaponized mosquitos, “evening culottes,” Andy Garcia playing Tommy Bahama…it’s a lot.

While I must admit watching Jamie Dornan try to sing and dance is mildly amusing, the Austin Powers-esque maniacal side plot felt distracting and not a lotta fun. I’d rather hang with Barb and Star the whole time; you know, drink frozen cocktails and complain about brain freeze, gush over all the necklaces they got at Bayleaf It Ornate, lounge by the pool in our cover-ups, and fully dissect their crushes on Mr. Peanut and Kermit the Frog while Shania’s “Man! I Feel Like a Woman!” thumps in the background. It feels like a studio handed Wiig and Mumolo a blank check after their success with Bridesmaids, and why not? They deserve it. I just wish they would have reined things in a tiny bit, or nixed the Sharon Gordon Fisherman storyline. I have a feeling that Barb and Star Go to Vista Del Mar could be one of those movies that either surprisingly turns into a cult hit, or polarizes viewers into “hated it” or “loved it” camps. It remains to be seen how people will take to this completely bananapants movie, and I can’t wait to hear what others think. In the meantime, I’m gonna sit back, relax, crack open a pop, and eat some candy bar salad.