Directed by Zack Snyder
Written by Chris Terrio, Zack Snyder, and Will Beal
Starring Ben Affleck, Gal Gadot, Ezra Miller, Ray Fisher, Jason Momoa, Amy Adams, and Henry Cavill
Unrated
Runtime: 4 hours 2 minutes
Now streaming on HBO Max

by Audrey Callerstrom, Staff Writer

Call it a puff piece, but the Vanity Fair article on the Zack Snyder cut broke my damn heart. I did not see the original Justice League. At the time I had a baby, but word was that I didn’t miss anything. Joss Whedon being pulled in seemed to give it bad juju, and this was before people started coming forth about what an a-hole he was/is to work with. So, sure, I was biased coming in, but that’s pretty rare for me here at MovieJawn. Most of the films I review I haven’t heard of before.

There are moments in Zack Snyder’s Justice League that you just kind of have to forgive to fully enjoy it. I don’t see how the four-hour run time is a hindrance, since everyone is already watching it at home, and aren’t you all binging hours of television shows anyway? You can watch this Justice League like that. It’s even split up into multiple “parts” for you to do so. The cast of characters is all here, all with their varying strengths and weaknesses, and I’m not talking about the acting, a-cha-cha! I think Ben Affleck is a convincing Batman, he doesn’t overdo the seriousness like Bale did. He’s not tortured or really very brooding, he’s more like a really good manager.* Gal Gadot is limited as Wonder Woman, but we already knew that, and the film doesn’t concern her very much. She even gets a pretty cool and well- choreographed action scene in the beginning. The strongest performances here are from Ray Fisher as Victor/Cyborg (who had less screen time in the Whedon version), Ezra Miller as Barry/The Flash (same) and Ciaran Hinds as the voice of the villain Steppenwolf who looks like if the devil was covered in metal feathers. It’s cooler than I make it sound.

The longer running time allows for scenes that slow down the pace, to the film’s benefit. A dream sequence that felt choppy and dumb in Whedon’s version serves a greater purpose here. I’m even willing to overlook just how consistently bad Jared Leto’s Joker is. He’s about as menacing as a goth teen whose mom dropped him off at the mall with $20. But it does allow for more time with Fisher, an exceptionally strong performer. Not everyone can pull off comic book dialogue and really make it resonate. Fisher can. He’s exceptional. “I’ve never heard of him, I wonder if he’s a stage actor,” I thought; yes, he is. Miller provides the film’s only couple moments of levity in giddy awe of Batman and being asked to join the team. 

Right, the plot. Where Whedon’s version starts from Superman’s death in Batman v. Superman: Dawn of Justice, then immediately starts bringing the League together. This League takes its time. Superman’s cries as he is impaled on a Kryptonite spear are heard around the world (and beyond) particularly to the members of the soon-to-be-formed Justice League. It’s moving. Steppenwolf, acting under direction of the super villain Darkseid (also omitted from Whedon’s version), is assembling the “Mother Boxes,” three cubes hidden in three separate places that have suddenly awoken now that Superman is dead and world is vulnerable. The Mother Boxes, when combined, can end the world. Or kill everyone. Or something, I dunno. They’re bad basically. But also, good? When they come alive they look like these.

In pursuit of the Mother Boxes, Steppenwolf has his own version of flying monkeys, known as Parademons. They look like big metal mosquitoes with glowing eyes. They are ugly and gross. They can put little bugs on our face to read your mind. While the Parademons wreak havoc on a few scientists, including Victor’s dad (Joe Morton, Termination 2: Judgment Day), Batman works in earnest to assemble the heroes and get them aligned on the plan. Aquaman (Jason Momoa) in initially reluctant, and he has a bad attitude and is sort of a bitch, but he does take off his shirt to a Nick Cave song, so. We get an extra moment of seeing Barry use his powers in real time. Why Snyder chose to show someone who goes really fast always going in slow motion, I don’t know, but it’s cute how he rescues a girl (Kiersey Clemons) from a car wreck without anyone noticing.

Overall Snyder’s Justice League looks dark and sort of drab, which seems intentional. Reds are never reds, always maroon. Lots of time in rooms without windows, like Batman’s lair. It’s rarely daylight, and when it is, it’s overcast. Visually, he seems inspired by Tim Burton. I’ve seen a majority of Snyder’s films (not the “owl one”), and I know to expect. Slow-mo, lots of battle cries, no daylight, CGI, Jack White-esque guitar riffs, a Superman (Henry Cavill) that just doesn’t quite hit the mark and a Lois (Amy Adams) who carries the load. It makes me wonder if a lot of comic book stories are better served in this episodic format, just like with WandaVision. With Zack Snyder’s Justice League, more is more.

*And a zaddy!**
**delete this later