Directed by Giuseppe Capotondi
Starring Elizabeth Debicki, Donald Sutherland and Claes Bang
Running time: 1 hour and 39 minutes
MPAA rating: R for some sexual content/nudity, language, drug use and violence

by Fiona Underhill

When watching the new art forgery flick The Burnt Orange Heresy, I guess the first alarm bells start ringing when you realize that the wonderfully tall and talented 30 year old Elizabeth Debicki’s male co-stars are Claes Bang (aged 53), Mick Jagger (aged 77) and Donald Sutherland (aged 85). All three of them flirt with her (at minimum) or have a sexual relationship with her (in the case of Bang). Things become worse when it dawns on you that everyone except Sutherland are miscast, in some cases to a severe degree.

Bang plays ‘young’ (cough) and ambitious art dealer James Figueras, who lectures on art forgery as a side hustle. Debicki’s Berenice Hollis comes to one of the lectures and is so seduced by the big “aha” moment in the lecture that she immediately sleeps with James. The next day, James whisks Berenice off to Lake Como, where the mysterious Joseph Cassidy (Mick Jagger) manipulates him into stealing a painting from the even more mysterious, elusive and reclusive painter Jerome Debney (Donald Sutherland), who lives on the grounds of Cassidy’s sumptuous villa. Berenice is used as a pawn to butter Debney up, in the hope he will show James the paintings he has been working on. They will be extremely high in value once finished, because all of his other paintings have been destroyed in mysterious fires. The whole thing’s a mystery!

It’s been a long time since I’ve seen a film featuring such an unlikeable protagonist, played by an unfortunately badly miscast actor, with a plot revolving around him that is such utter nonsense – it is impossible to summon up a reason to care about anyone or anything that happens. Although I’m not that familiar with Bang’s work, I am fully prepared to believe that he’s a good actor. Why he, as a Danish man has been cast as a Londoner who clearly should be at least twenty years younger in order for his character to make any sense, is beyond me. I feel like Bang has lost a bet – to have to do a horrendous and hilarious Mick Jagger cockney accent … in a film in which he co-stars with Mick Jagger. Bang, who is in his fifties, is referred to as both an “ambitious young man” and an “earnest young man” during the course of this film and I felt like I was losing my mind. I look forward to Debicki being the same age as Bang and described in the same terms in a film.

The miscasting does not stop at Bang. Debicki, once again, does not get to be Australian, but instead is supposed to be a midwestern “girl from the sticks” who takes advice from a homely Aunt Sally. Granted, this is questioned by James during the film, following the film’s theme that no one and nothing is as it seems. The film is clumsily trying to communicate the message that people can be forgeries too. Berenice is supposed to be a naïve ingenue and it would make much more sense if she were student age (around 20) and James were 30. Debicki is fiercely intelligent and mature, so watching her follow James around like a puppy and mostly accept what is going on just doesn’t ring true.

Finally, Mick Jagger is always going to be an example of ‘stunt casting’ which takes you out of the film and it is hard to buy him as a shrewd puppet-master of the art market, wielding his power for evil. Berenice and Debney are the only likeable characters in the film and are both treated extremely badly by James and Cassidy. Protagonists don’t have to be perfect or even likeable, but we need a reason to care, to be invested in something about them and their journey during a film. When the only characters you actually care about are dispensed with and you’re forced to follow someone you couldn’t give two hoots about, whose motivations are utterly banal and he becomes a comically over-the-top villain…well, if you’re anything like me, you’ll be begging for the story to end.

Sutherland and Debicki’s shared scenes are the highlight, with Sutherland being the only actor that fits the role he is playing. However, the book that this film was based on was published in 1971 and, while it’s been updated to the present day, the dialogue and characterization remain firmly in the past. Berenice comes back from a boat trip with Debney which James has sent her on to ‘feel him out’ and he says; “tell Papa (referring to himself in the third person – yuck) about the boat ride” and “what did you two love birds talk about.” The whole thing is stomach-churningly patronizing and misogynistic.

It is clear that the writer Scott B. Smith and director Guiseppe Capotondi really think they’ve got something clever on their hands, what with the ‘Emperor’s New Clothes’ reveal about Debney’s paintings and the twisty plot that keeps bait-and-switching in a way they hope will mirror the concept of “how can you really tell truth from lie, forgery from authenticity?” But it’s too ridiculous and the characters are too awful for any audience investment to happen. It’s been a long time since I felt like watching a film was such a giant waste of time. Debicki deserves better and the sudden realization that this could end up being one of Donald Sutherland’s last films fills me with horror. There are a LOT of worthy films available on demand that deserve your time and attention at the moment. This is not one of them.